She isn't who she seems
by drunkmellark
Summary: During the Quarter Quell, Johanna is trying to keep her feelings for herself but she couldn't keep them forever. Katniss's POV.


"Katniss" I hear someone says. "Katniss" the voice says. My eyes slowly open and I can barely see what's in my front, I try to focus and I get surprise by seeing Johanna. "I'm sorry for waking you up, but I need someone to talk." _What did she say? _Oh, wait, she needs to talk? With me? "With me?" I ask. "Well, there is no one else here who would understand what I need to say like you." She whispers.

I am surprise by her requisition, even here, during the Quarter Quell, it's not a great place to talk. But I don't deny, my mind seems too blurry to tell me if it's good or not. "What do you want to talk about?" I low my voice so no one can hear it. "To be honest, I don't really know. I just needed someone here." she says.

"And why me?" I ask, maybe she answers or she just ignores it. But she answers it.

"You seems like the only person who I can trust here." Johanna says, looking down to the sand.

"Johanna..." my mind is still numb, but my acts can be still controlled, but I don't know why I did it, but I touch her hand. This surprises her, but she doesn't pull away.

"As much I don't like you, I know there is something I like about you. Something you are hiding from me." And I know it, Johanna is a strong woman, and maybe she isn't this rude person it looks like. I must be wrong, but I think I am seeing a tear falling from her cheeks, and I reach my hand and dry it, proving her I won't hurt her.

"I'm not like this, I wasn't I mean." Johanna says, trying not to cry. "But I don't have someone like Peeta or your cousin Gale or even a family to comfort me. Life taught me to be this way. The way I wasn't." My hand squeezes harder hers, and I never saw Johanna this way, so fragile, so unprotected, so lonely, so afraid.

"Can you tell me what happened?" I ask.

Johanna takes a deep breath and looks through my eyes. "I don't have a family, or someone to be with me. My mom died when I was 13."

"How?" She looks angry by my question, but she continues. "It's not only District 12 who has hunger problems, Katniss. District 7 had too, and my family was poor, we couldn't buy food like my friends could. And one day my mom was sick, she needed medicine but my dad couldn't buy it, it was too expensive." she stops, I wonder because she is remembering everything and it hurts. So I do what I think it's better, I hold her hand and I put my other hand over it, in gesture of protection. More tears falls from her eyes but she doesn't stop.

"My mom slept, saying it would get better if she rests, but she never woke up after it. My dad was crying so much and he came to me and said: 'Honey, I will take mom out of here, but I can't promise I will came back, so you will have to be strong, wich you are. I love you'. And he left the house with my mom in his arms, and I wait him to come back. But he didn't. I was alone."

For the moment Johanna started talking I forgot I was in the Games, but now I remember it, so I look back for a while to see if someone is woke up, but no one is. "I'm sorry." I say, and I truly am.

"Don't be. No one has to." she says.

I understand why she is what she is now, being alone is a great thing, but when you are older you realize that you are missing too much, and Johanna had to understand this too young. She had to be someone she wasn't. I fell something in my heart, a different feeling. It's not mercy or pain. It's something else, wich makes me put my arm around her and hug her without thinking. She allows it and press me tighter on her. Johanna isn't a bad person, she has a good heart, and that's what I like on her, even thought I didn't know until now. Maybe this is against the rules for my love for Peeta, _Peeta_, for this moments I just had I forgot about him, I forgot about everyone and everything, it was just me and Johanna, who now it's someone I trust and, for the most part of the time now, I admire.

She is still holding me when she says "Thank you." I nod and close my eyes trying not to forget this moment, wich Johanna and me are in the same side, the same team. "You must sleep Johanna, I stay here." I say.

"No." she says "Go sleep Katniss, I will be here, you better sleep."

I don't argue with her and just lay again because I know I am tired and this is the best thing to do. For a moment I just stare at her back, thinking about she just said to me. Seconds later I close slowly my eyes. I feel something, I feel Johanna's hand in my head, I guess she thought I was already asleep. "Thank you for being here for me, and trusting me. I like you." she whispers really low, that I barely hear, and I keep this words in my sleep, because somehow here in the Games, I learned how to like Johanna back.


End file.
